New site design implemented yesterday…let’s celebrate with 10 more Chuck Norris Facts!
1. Saddam Hussein was not found hiding in a “hole.” Saddam was roundhouse-kicked in the head by Chuck Norris in Kansas, which sent him through the earth, stopping just short of the surface of Iraq.
2. President Roosevelt once rode his horse 100 miles. Chuck Norris carried his the same distance in half the time.
3. Life is not, in fact, like a box of chocolates. It is more like a box of Chuck Norris, roundhouse kicking you in the face. And if you receive a box of Chuck Norris, you ALWAYS know what you are going to get.
4. If at first you don’t succeed, you’re not Chuck Norris.
5. It is scientifically impossible for Chuck Norris to have had a mortal father. The most popular theory is that he went back in time and fathered himself.
6. When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.
7. Two wrongs don’t make a right. Unless you’re Chuck Norris. Then two wrongs make a roundhouse kick to the face.
8. All roads lead to Chuck Norris. And by the transitive property, a roundhouse kick to the face.
9. Chuck Norris once participated in the running of the bulls. He walked.
10. If you Google search “Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked” you will generate zero results. It just doesn’t happen.
