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Paris Hilton Will Get Eaten Alive

paris hilton jail

As the convicted drunk we all know as Paris Hilton continues to fear the inevitable, experienced jailbirds are coming out of the woodwork to offer their advice for a pleasant stay in the pen! Page Six interviewed a former call girl that thinks Paris will get raped in the shower.

Be afraid of jail, Paris Hilton - be very, very afraid. That’s the ominous word from Natalia McLennan, the former $2,000-an-hour hooker who was splashed on the cover of New York Magazine as “New York’s No. 1 Escort” and spent 26 days at Rikers Island. “It’s the worst experience of your life - you’re locked up, the food is disgusting and everybody wants to be your friend, but in the end they just want to [bleep] you,” McLennan, who is now a stylist at a top Montreal spa, told Page Six. First, McLennan says, Hilton must brace herself for an embarrassing physical that includes a full-body cavity search. She should also get used to being eyeballed by horny lesbian inmates. “She’ll want to make at least one good friend, like a Nicole Richie, to watch her back for her when she takes a shower . . . And I’d tell her, ‘Drop the attitude.’ ”

Damn! For some reason I don’t envision Paris making a single friend, and I’m also afraid her privates are in grave danger of being violated on a daily basis upon entering lockup.

NOTE TO READERS: IF YOU HAVEN’T NOTICED OUR NINJA LOGO HAS BEEN REPLACED WITH A TRIBUTE TO PARIS’ JAIL SENTENCE. LET’S HOPE SHE STAYS LOCKED UP FOREVER!

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Posted Wednesday, May 16th, 2007


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