Wilmer Slithers In For Rihanna Lovin’

I guess the python Wilmer Valderrama is truly a man without shame, having reportedly been involved in the deeper stroking of a broken soul–more specifically, Rihanna and her powdered, glittery face with a tight-clad body and drunken, wandering-lips.

Our spy says: “Rihanna looked so pretty and Wilmer could hardly take his eyes off her. “They were chatting and laughing for ages. They looked pretty cosy and relaxed in each other’s company. Wilmer was all charm and even had a bottle of champagne for Rihanna.”

It was the second time that week that Rihanna was out partying without boyfriend Chris Brown, following their pre-Grammys bust up.

Does reading this bit intensify those feelings, longing you’d instead been born Wilmer V. ? Hahaha…